Next, stop avoiding conversations you think might lead to an argument and instead learn to have the discussion without arguing. You do that by choosing to learn from the conversation instead of teaching. Don't try to educate the other person, prove them wrong or change their mind, because that probably won't happen.

　　Instead, make it your goal to learn more about their perspective (视角).This is an excellent way to increase your own empathy and stimulate (激发) your mind with new ideas. You may disagree with what they're saying, but you're doing a lot of good for yourself in listening to them with respect.

　　And that brings us to the next step:listen. Listening is a skill and we aren't born knowing how to do it well. Often we hear just the first few words someone speaks and then start making our response. That's a common habit and it's hard to break.

　　In order to listen effectively, you have to allow thoughts to enter your head and then let them flow right back out so you can return to listening. It's not easy, but it's necessary if you hope to really hear and understand what another person is saying.

　　Learning to listen is an intensely rewarding experience. The people around you, even strangers, have secrets and hidden talents. If you haven't heard them, you've missed out on a lot of fascinating stories and helpful advice.

　　We have all become very expert at expressing our own thoughts and feelings, and social media gives us endless methods for publishing them. But talking teaches you nothing, so it's no surprise when we learn nothing about each other and find it hard to keep the conversation going.

　　So, put your mobile down and look at the people around you. Take a chance and ask someone a question, and then really listen to their answer. You might be surprised by the change in your perspective.

Passage outline Supporting details A phenomenon

worth nothing With the availability of modern media, conversation is being　1　 by talking.