younger that she would "snap his leg" if he moved again. As I waited for the traffic light to change, the child began to complain and struggle to free himself from the woman's grasp. She dropped the phone, seized the neck of his tiny Tshirt and gave him a back-hand blow across the face that I know made his little head spin.

　　The light changed, and passersby continued on their way. But I stood there, fixed to the pavement. I knew

this extremely upset woman would carry through on her threat of violence to the child. Before, I had wanted to approach her and offer to watch the youngster while she dealt with the troubling situation on the phone. Now I wanted to comfort the little boy. I also wanted to speak to the sister to calm her and to caution her, as I wish someone had cautioned me when I was passing my pain on to my daughter and causing her emotional suffering. But I was chicken. I thought, she may think I'm out of line, or I may be her next target.

　　Often I've thought about that child and the many others abused by adults. I wonder how they will internalize their pain, and if it will crush their spirits. Will this little boy grow up to be an abusive man? Will he be gloomy and withdrawn? Will he find it hard to communicate with women, with other men? Or will he survive and be sensitive, caring and determined not to continue the cycle?

　　There is too much cruelty in the world, too much cruelty between people. I tremble at the increasing verbal bitterness and violence among Black girls, and among young mothers trying to discipline their children. This behavior isn't class-or age-related: I hear sharp words from Black women from all walks of life who are overworked and stressed out and have grown impatient. At times I, too, become impolite to others, or, like the sister on the phone, strike out at (抨击) those closest to me.

Often we're tired because we've made the wrong choices. Young girls who still need mothering are loaded with children. We sisters easily get hurt and annoyed when we don't compromise with our own sense of self. Our personal fulfillment requires knowing what is best for us, setting our boundaries and keeping them undamaged. We will always be asked to do more than we are comfortable doing. When we know our